I just realized something about me. My best friend often says: “Jeng, you’re a hypocrite!” I knew that. I am a hypocrite. But what I just realized is not about that I’m a hypocrite, but one of the evidences that I’m a hypocrite.

Yesterday morning, I didn’t wanna talk to my best friend just because she did something I really hate the night before. Then, she asked me why did I become so quiet, she asked me whether I’m in a bad mood or not. I answered that yes, I’m in a very bad mood because of her. She apologized but I didn’t care, I answered that I’d accept her apology after 24 hours. She told me not to do that because in the evening she’d be back to her boarding house, if I’d accept her apology after 24 hours, that means I would not talk to her until she back to her boarding house.

After that we had couple minutes conversation, and finally the problem had been solved! So, I stopped the i-don’t-wanna-talk-to-you act. And since then, I kept asking her: “At what time you’re gonna leave to your boarding house?” But the reality was actually, I didn’t want to say that. The real sentences that pop-up in my head was actually: “Please don’t go back to your boarding house. Please stay here for one more night. I spent a night without talking to you. It’s kinda weird! Please staaaaayy!!!” But instead of blabering those sentences, I preferred to keep asking her at what time would she leave. So I’d know how many time left until she’d go. At the end, she stayed for one more night at my home. And guess what? I was so happy! But (again), instead of telling her how happy I was, I preferred to say: “Watta wishy-washy girl! You said earlier that you’re gonna back to your boarding house, but at the end you stay here.”

D’oh I hate myself for being this hypocrite!!! HILFE!!!!!